Stewart 'Grave' Gibson is the fighting game loving, Doomguy worshipping, Motorhead listening maniac of DarkSpawn Gaming. When not ripping and tearing Stewart can be found riding the open roads or at the nearest Lucha Libre event.
So as all gamers know when it comes to movies about video games, 99% percent of them end up a steaming pile of dog-turd. The reason for this is simple, instead of using the amazing characters, stories, settings and attitudes of games, the writers, producers and directors think they know better, which clearly they don’t. Video game movies have not only been bad but in some cases they have been some of the worst movies ever made, Far Cry and Hitman: Agent 47 but to name a few. However, there are a few diamonds among the rough such as Ratchet and Clank or Mortal Kombat, these movies were made for the fans of the game and no-one else. There are also a few ‘meh’ game films but today we’re going to explain how to make a ‘meh’ in a masterpiece.
Now if you check the reviews from movie critics they will tell you Ratchet and Clank is just okay but ask any fan of the games who has seen the film and they will tell you it’s awesome because that’s who the film was made for, fans of the series. Most game movies are made not because Hollywood thinks it’s a good story to tell but because Hollywood sees cash signs and profit. This means they will allow only old muppet to write only old rubbish just so a movie with the name Assassins Creed gets pumped out and fans and non-fans go see it. To be blunt about this, some video game movie scripts have actually been some insanely bad fan fiction or in worse cases a writer will read a small blog about the game and then write a story about the characters. This is how we ended up getting movies like Tekken, where Steve Fox was Jin’s mentor and 20 years older than him. Movies like almost this make me think that the writer never even read about the game let alone play it, how can you get basic details like that so badly wrong? Take Doom as another example, the one recurring factor about Doom is demons from hell attacking Mars. The movie decides to drop that completely and have evolution or genomes or something, hell, they couldn’t even get the name of the BFG 9000 correct!
(It’s like a bad cosplay gathering)
Next you have the movies that attach big name actors just to try and get some attention but this too is a mistake. If you are making a movie about a short fat Italian Plumber who saves a princess from a huge dinosaur do you really want Dennis Hooper playing the Dinosaur? I mean, what’s next? Ryan Gosling playing Crash Bandicoot. Instead of paying millions of dollars for an A-List celebrity to phone in a movie why not have the people who created the franchise write it for you and then have your Hollywood studio animate it? We have the technology to put together amazing animated movies in this day and age so why not use that to make the long awaiting Uncharted, Halo and Tomb Raider movies and have the voice actors reprise the roles instead of some huge name actor or actress who doesn’t care about the project looked bored for 90 minutes. Just look at movies like Resident Evil or Max Payne if you need any more evidence.
(I always hated this part in the game)
Now, at time of writing a new Sonic the Hedgehog movie is in the works and let’s not mess around here, the design of Sonic alone is enough to let you know that this movie is going to be an absolute abomination. Once Hollywood has decided it knows better than the creators, fans and anyone who knows the slightest thing about the blue blur and went ahead and changed the main characters look, the settings of the game and even the reason for the main character doing what he does. Then again, maybe we’ll all be surprised and it will be good, no I didn’t type that with a straight face so don’t claim you read it with one.
(Fan art has actually come to life)
Now, at this point you may be thinking that it isn’t all that easy to make a game into a working movie script but again, you’d be wrong. It so easy that it’s almost criminal how Hollywood is constantly making a total pigs ears out of them. Let’s take Halo for example; the first game basically is a movie anyway so this almost makes it too easy. This could easily be a great 2 hour sci-fi action movie, hell you might even get away with using actors in this one but fans would want the real Master Chief voice and under no circumstances does that helmet come off. There would be enough plot, action and suspense to easily make a movie , I mean, if you aren’t seeing it all come together already then maybe you should go take a lie down as this article may be a much for you. The same could easily be done with the first God of War, Uncharted, Mass Effect or Monster Hunter.
So there we go folks, the perfect recipe for the perfect video game movie, now all we need to do is teach Hollywood how to stay out of the kitchen and leave the movie making to people who make the award winning games.